I recently finished a journal. Here's a picture. :)
I got this at my seminary graduation in 2009. I recieved a lot of journals that year, actually. Haha. I guess people thought it was important for me to keep my thoughts. They're right and I'm grateful to have them. :)
For those of you who are counting this puts me at three completed journals since I began journaling at age 8. I really, really love writing in my journal. It helps me sort out my thoughts and keep track of the big and small events in my life. I don't write everyday, but I write enough to feel that I'm chronicling my life.
It was kind of cool because just as I was about to finish this journal we began discussing journals in my Notebooks and Journals class (go figure, haha). My professor brought up the question of if we thought journals should be censored. Should we worry about what we write in a private journal? One of my friends in that class gave an example of how after her grandmother died they found her old journals and read them. There were some hurtful things in there and now it's a big issue in their family. Should they burn the journals? Keep them?
So that got me thinking about my own journals. Some things I've written are very personal. Things I wouldn't necessarily want my family or friends to see. I write about them. I've probably written about each of you who read this blog at one point or another in my journal. Most of the experiences are great. Some aren't.
I don't know about you guys, but I write my journal with my future family in mind. I imagine my kids reading my journal or my husband. Having them passed down in the family as little treasures. I want to put my own experiences down on paper, the good and the bad, because I think to those future generations and how they may experience the same kinds of things I'm going through. And I want to live my life in a way that they can look at my life throug my journals and see what I did well or maybe didn't do so well. This way they can live good lives.
Writing with my future family in mind also keeps me optimistic in my journal, which keeps me optimistic in my life. It helps me realize that I really do love life and the people in it, even if at times we disagree or life gets hard. This is something I want my children and everyone I love to realize. We are all human. Having negative and unhappy thoughts or hard times is just part of the territory. But we don't have to dwell on the negatives in our lives. Sometimes writing down the bad things and the negative thoughts can help you figure out what you truly believe by giving yourself a chance to react to them without judgement.
Anyway, I hope this post hasn't rambled on too much. These are just some thoughts that have been on my mind lately. I'm excited to start a new journal. It feels like a new beginning, a fresh start. So, to end this post I'm going to put my disclaimer that I wrote to go in my latest journal (an exercise suggested in my class). Enjoy! :)
Dear Reader,
My name is Erin. I wrote the following journal when I was 18-19 and it chronicles my life from 2009 to early 2011. Before you read, just know this was a time of great change for me. I began college, changed things that needed changing, and learned a lot in the process. I feel I’ve changed for the better and hopefully that shows in my journal. I speak of many people, many topics, in this journal. I beg you not to be offended. Of, if it can’t be helped, I beg you to forgive me. Please don’t judge my journal too harshly. As you read I invite you to look at your own life, times when you’ve felt frustrated or sad or hurt, or maybe even happy and elated beyond words. We have a lot in common, reader, you and I. Just know that the whole of me, all my thoughts, actions, desires, and experiences are not contained solely within these pages. Please believe of me, as you would of yourself, that I am and have inside myself much more good than bad.
Happy Reading!
Erin Guy
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