Quick & Easy Barbecue Cream Cheese Chicken Wrap-ups!

Every Sunday while I'm in church and I catch my mind wandering, it's always wandering to the same place--What am I going to make for dinner? As a single woman living alone, I get to make whatever I want without worrying about if other people will like it. If I have the ingredients and I think it sounds yummy, I'm going to try it.

I haven't always been this way. No, it's only been since living on my own that I've discovered how much I like to experiment with food. It also helped that I spent a good solid week at my internship just looking at cooking blogs. I know, it was a sweet gig.

But since my internship is coming to an end and I'll probably be moving back to home to Ogden soon, I need to start using up all the food I've acquired and I need to use it within the next couple weeks.

Today I thought about all the chicken breasts I had in the freezer. What can I make in with chicken tonight? I thought.

My go-to since living on my own is barbecue chicken. Thaw the chicken, grill it up in a sauce pan on the stove, put some barbecue sauce on it, and serve with a baked potato. Super easy! But this week I was lazy and didn't buy potatoes. I did, however, have Pillsbury Crescent Roll dough.

Ever since my mission, when a member of the church made this yummy dessert with cream cheese, strawberries, and crescent roll dough, I always make sure to have a can on hand. It's really simple to whip up a filling (for breakfast I do jam & cream cheese, for dessert I do chocolate sauce, chocolate chips, & cream cheese) and bake. But I'd never made a dinner filling.

Why not? I thought. So, I spent the rest of the church meeting planning what I'd make.

First, I filled a pot of water (enough to cover 2 chicken breasts) and put it on the stove. Next I added two frozen chicken breasts (because who has time for thawing?) and cranked up the heat. I figured they could thaw while the water warmed up. It took probably 40 minutes for them to cook all the way through, which was fine. I just watched Netflix at the kitchen counter while keeping my eye on the chicken.

When the chicken was cooked I took it out and shredded the breasts with a fork. Then I added my favorite barbecue sauce to the bowl (I love Sweet Baby Ray's Raspberry Chipotle Barbecue Sauce. Side story: I had never tried it, but the girl whose apartment I'm living in for the summer while she's away, had some in the fridge. So one day I tried it, and now I'm hooked. Don't worry, I bought her a new bottle and one for myself too. ;) Once the sauce and chicken were mixed I placed it in the fridge so the chicken could soak up some of that yummy raspberry chipotle flavor.

After a few hours, when I was starting to get hungry, I pulled out the chicken and put it in a sauce pan with a little more than half a block of cream cheese. As I was stirring it together, I started to get worried. Here's my disclaimer: I am not a professional or experienced chef by any means. But I am an avid watcher of Chopped, so I heard the judges voices in my head going, That's a rookie mistake, barbecue sauce and cream cheese. This will cost Chef Erin dearly at the chopping block.

But once the cream cheese was melted, I finally decided to try it. And can I just say . . . It was yummy! Sweet, but with a little kick thanks to the chipotle. Have you ever had jalepeno jam with cream cheese on a cracker? That's what this tasted like, but with chicken! Then I added salt and pepper (because, aren't you always supposed to add that? For flavor or whatever?) and set it aside.

After that it was just a matter of adding a generous helping of filling to each crescent roll, and then baking for 15 minutes at 350.

How delicious do those look! I just ate mine with a side of carrots, but you could pair it with chips, a salad, chocolate cake . . . You know, whatever.;) These are also great to eat on-the-go for a quick meal.

So, there ya go! Quick & Easy Barbecue Cream Cheese Chicken Wrap-ups! Thanks for indulging me & letting me try my hand at food blogging. XD Maybe I'll post more ideas in the future.

Barbecue Cream Cheese Chicken Wrap-ups Recipe

Ingredients
-2 Chicken Breasts
-1 pckg Pillsbury Crescent Rolls
-Barbecue Sauce of Your Choice (I used Sweet Baby Ray's Raspberry Chipotle Barbecue Sauce)
-1/2 pckg Cream Cheese
-Salt & Pepper to taste

1. Cook chicken breasts and shred.

2. Mix in 1 cup barbecue sauce until chicken is coated. Set aside in fridge to marinate a couple hours.

3. Place chicken mixture in sauce pan over medium-high heat. Add cream cheese.

4. When cream cheese is melted and chicken is hot, add salt & pepper to taste.

5. Follow crescent roll instructions for pre-heating oven.

6. Open crescent rolls & lay out on baking pan. Add heaping spoonful of chicken mixture to each roll, then carefully roll up. (P.S. The chicken doesn't have to be completely wrapped--it's okay if it sticks out the sides. Those pieces just get crispy and delicious.)

7. Cook wrap-ups in oven until golden brown.

8. Cool and enjoy!

Let Yourself Be Happy

I had kind of an embarrassing moment over the 4th of July weekend. I basically had an emotional meltdown with weeks of pent-up stress spilling out for my whole family and our 4th of July guests to see. I was shaking and screaming and fighting with people I love. Eventually, I had to just walk off by myself around the block to release some of the insane energy that had possessed me. It helped a little, but I still felt angry and like I might shatter into a million pieces.

It wasn't my proudest moment.

Moving to Provo has been great. I like living on my own and doing what I want, when I want. I love my internship. My ward and the people I've met there are nice. But until this weekend, I hadn't realized just how stressed I am.

See, being on my own has been good and bad. It's made me more responsible. I've become more thrifty. I've been able to prove myself, in a way. But it's been really hard being stuck alone with my thoughts all the time. I'm about halfway through my internship and I have no idea what I'm going to do after. That scares me. I don't know how I'm going to support myself. I don't know what kind of jobs to apply for. So then I stay up late with my heart pounding and my thoughts running in circles, and I scour the job boards. My life seems to start collapsing in around me and I can't see where my place in this world is going to be. It's scary.

These thoughts got even worse when I went home for the holiday. I was surrounded by my family, people that I love, and all I could think about was what a gigantic failure I am. I feel like I've been faking success up until now and that if I don't get a job quickly after my internship, everyone will finally see through my facade. They'll too realize that I'm a failure. That I'm worried. That I have doubts. That I'm afraid. My meltdown let people see that side to me a lot sooner than I'd been mentally prepared for. My confident exterior had cracked and I felt completely defeated.

Driving home that night back to Provo, back to another week alone in my apartment, I blared music loud to try and shut out my thoughts and feelings. I wanted to keep burying myself and my problems. I kept trying to tell myself I was fine. But as I sang along with the radio, tears blurred the road and my voice cracked.

I can't keep doing this. I can't keep feeling this way. I need to get out of my head. Out of the house. When was the last time I did anything for fun?

I couldn't think of a time in the past couple weeks that I did something that actually made me happy. Instead, everything I did made me feel guilty.

You should be looking for a job, I'd think as I washed the dishes.

You should be working on your books, I'd think as I cooked dinner.

You shouldn't be spending money on that. Your bank account's getting low, I'd think as I bought groceries.

This guilt and the ridiculous standards I was holding myself to were going to kill me. I couldn't keep feeling guilty about everything that brought me a little bit of happiness. I deserve to be happy. I deserve to not feel like a failure.

So on the drive home, I made a list of all the fun things I could do. Drive to Draper and visit the aquarium. Go see a movie in the theater. Get an ice cream cone at the BYU creamery. Visit my friends and have lunch. Go the mall and buy myself something from Bath & Body Works.

But when I got back home to my apartment, I felt discouraged. My guilt was rooted in real issues I'm facing--the plummeting number in my savings account, the lack of a plan after August, and the neglect of my goals. My problems wouldn't just go away because I went to the aquarium or got some ice cream.

With this mix of emotions creating a volatile cocktail in my blood, I turned on my computer and opened YouTube. That's a skill I could put on my resume--Great at avoiding her feelings and problems by surfing the internet. One of my recommended videos caught my eye and I decided to click on it. This was the video.



Now, don't tell me that at the chorus you didn't find yourself swaying along with the drunken customers? And don't tell me you didn't laugh your a** off when the wife started singing about her cunning little husband. Cause I did. And after I did, I felt a lot better. My problems were still there. But I felt lighter. And I realized, sadly, that I hadn't laughed for real in a long, long time. It was magic.

That's when I decided I'm going to let myself be happy. I love Broadway shows and musicals, but didn't let myself watch them because they're "a waste of time." Not anymore. If I feel like watching that Les Mis clip three times a day for the rest of my life, I'm going to do it because it makes me happy. If I want to make brownies, I'm going to do it, because it makes me happy. If I want to have a Friends marathon, I'm going to do it, why? Because it makes me happy.

My problems are going to be there whether I'm obsessing and miserable about them or not. So I might as well obsess and find happiness where I can.

Now that I've let myself feel some happiness, things are getting better. But I still worry. And I still have no clue what's going to happen at the end of August. However, I've found that despite the worry and the fear, there are little pockets of sunshine that get me through the darkness. My pockets of sunshine are juggling. Playing the piano. Reading a book for fun. And I've discovered something weird.

As I've let myself be happy, I've become more motivated to write. I decided to update this blog. I cleaned up my apartment. I did my dishes. Allowing myself to be happy has done more to improve my desire to reach my goals than all my guilt-tripping ever did.

So, my advice is to let yourself be happy. Watch that funny YouTube video. Take 5 minutes away from homework to play the guitar. Call up a friend and chat. The dishes will wait. The worrying will wait. Your problems will wait. But they're a lot less scary when faced with happiness in your heart.

Vloggers and Mukbang: Why are they so popular?

Hey guys!

I've been on this YouTube kick lately and I've started to watch a lot of vloggers. For those who might not know a vlogger is someone who vlogs, or video blogs. Rather than writing their musings or their daily lives on a "brick-and-mortar" blog like this, they record themselves and their thoughts or their day with a camera. There are TONS of vloggers out there. Some of my favorites include the Shaytards, Colleen Ballinger, Joshua DTV, Chris Ballinger, Miss Fenderr, Zoella, Joey Graceffa, Tyler Oakley . . . The list could literally go on. For many of the people I listed, vlogging and creating content for YouTube is their full-time job. Recording their lives and sharing it with others is how they pay the bills.

I was just watching one of these vlogs and couldn't help but wonder, why are vloggers so popular?

I have a theory: Our society has become more and more dependent on the internet to fulfill social needs, which explains why vloggers are so popular. I would guess that for most people, a lot of their relationships have some sort of tie to the virtual world. We connect more with people through a digital medium (FaceBook, Twitter, YouTube, texting, Tumblr, etc) than we do face-to-face. We spend so much time in the virtual world, that it's kind of cool and refreshing to see other people living their lives and to feel like we have a connection to them. We can feel like we've made a new best friend who does really awesome stuff (like going to Disneyland , or visiting Hawaii, or goes on the Ellen Degeneres show, or tell really awesome stories). These are real people with real lives and families just being themselves, and it's easy to feel a connection to them.

And then there's mukbang. Mukbang is a phenomenon happening in South Korea. Basically, men and women film themselves eating meals live and thousands (yes, I said THOUSANDS) of people watch. Through these websites viewers can send in "balloons" which then translate into money. For those who are more successful, mukbang becomes their full-time job. They are paid to eat food on camera. (Here's a news report on mukbang and also a reaction video if you want to learn more.)

I think mukbang works off the same sort of principal as vlogging--it helps people feel connected to someone else. In South Korea especially, many people live alone. They have long work days and come home to an empty apartment. Watching the mukbang, I imagine, helps the apartment come to life and seem less lonely.

My opinion is that these kind of relationships can be good to a certain extent. Real relationships can be formed online or through social media. Real friends and real memories can be made. Sometimes these virtual connections can help build in-person relationships. For example, Allison and I watch a lot of the same vloggers on YouTube, which gives us things to talk about when we're together. But, I think it's important not to let digital connections be the only type of relationships we have with people. It's important to spend time with those who are physically around us--not just those who we can only see or connect with through a screen. Because when we turn the computer off, or when the power goes out, or when our car runs out of gas on the highway, we're going to have to depend on the relationships we've formed with those who are around us for help.

Anyway, these are just my musings on the subject. Just a little food for thought!

So . . . It's been a year . . .

Hey guys!

So . . . It's been a year . . . since I last blogged . . .

That's really stupid. I think I need to blog more. Write about what's happening in my life and take time out to write certain topics that are on my mind. Ya know?

It's not like I haven't thought about blogging. I even started a lot of posts, but never published them. Maybe they'll see the light of day this year.

This past year a lot has happened. I got a job at Deseret Book, which I love! I work with amazing people and get to sell products great products (garments and books. That's all people need, right?). I picked up where I left off at Weber State and now I have two semesters left before I graduate. My major is English with a Creative Writing emphasis, and my minor is Communications. A few highlights from last semester:

-I got one of my songs published in Weber State's undergraduate journal, Metaphor.

-I wrote a pretty sweet arrangement of Let Us All Press On/ Called to Serve that you can download here if you want to check it out.

-I won $100 in a video contest at work.

-I was one of only 3 people in my upper division British Lit. class to get an A on my final essay the first time around. My professor told me she thought I'd do well in graduate school if I chose to go that route. Gave me something to think about.

Those are pretty much the highlights. Overall I think it's been a good year and two months being home from my mission. There are still a lot of things I miss about the mission--mostly the people. And I want to do better at applying what I learned from my mission to my every day life. But overall things are good.

Here's a list of some things I'm obsessed with as of late:

-Writing: I've always been obsessed with this, but now that I'm closer to graduating I'm really buckling down and getting stuff done. I'm about 40,000 words into my WIP (work in progress), and I'm hoping to have that done and get into editing by October. Exciting!

-The Broadway version of Cinderella with Laura Osnes and Santino Fontana: I'm particularly infatuated with the song "Loneliness of Evening." It's basically my favorite.



-NCIS: NCIS is now on Netflix and it is the best thing ever.

-Printing off my missionary emails home: This is taking a long time, and a lot of pages, but it's SO much fun to re-read my letters home. This is helping me remember more about my mission that I'd forgotten, like different people I taught or different experiences I had. :)

So, yeah! Things are going really good. Next week my family and I are heading out to Indiana for the temple open house (and to see One Direction in concert. Shh!). I'm excited to be out in the Midwest again and see everybody. That will make for some good posts, right?

Anyway, thanks for reading! Have a great Sunday!

Lesson 6: The Gospel of Jesus Christ

The gospel of Jesus Christ is faith in the Lord Jesus Christ, repentance, baptism, receiving the gift of the Holy Ghost, & enduring to the end.

"Gospel" is a word that I threw around A LOT growing up. I threw it around in talks and in seminary and in Sunday School. But my understanding of "the gospel of Jesus Christ" was very vague. Before my mission "the gospel" was this kind of blob that involved things like reading the scriptures, keeping the Sabbath holy, having faith, and doing what Jesus would do, etc.

So when Brother Doxey defined the gospel of Jesus Christ in our first lesson at the MTC, my mind was blown! What? THIS is what the gospel is? It's so simple! And it encompasses EVERYTHING we believe in the church. It encompasses all the commandments, it encompasses using the Atonement in our lives, serving others, etc. It's PERFECT.

The pattern of faith, repentance, baptism, receiving the Holy Ghost, and enduring to the end is presented time and time again in the scriptures. I remember one day I was reading Alma 32, which is a great sermon on faith. But then I discovered something amazing--Alma 33 . . . and Alma 34! Alma and Amulek didn't just teach the Zoramites about faith. They taught them about faith (how it's like a seed and needs nurturing, but that as you nourish it your faith is strengthened), and about repentance!

After teaching the people about faith in chapter 32 the people basically said, "Faith sounds great! But how can I get it?"

So Alma teaches them about repentance. Repentance means we not only stop doing what's wrong, but we start doing what's right. He taught them about prayer, studying the scriptures, and attending church. Why? Because keeping the commandments and bringing our lives in line with God's will through repentance is how we build our faith. It takes faith to pray when you aren't really sure if God is there or listening. It takes faith to study the scriptures because you believe it will help your family draw closer together. It takes faith to overcome your fears about being judged at church and go.

As a missionary, I was blessed to get to help people develop faith in Jesus Christ and repent. Some people chose to be baptized, others chose not to. But if their faith grew, I knew I was fulfilling my purpose. I got to be there when a woman prayed out loud for the first time and afterwards said she felt like there was a God who loved her. I got to feel the contentions in a busy household dissipate as the mother read the Book of Mormon. And I got to see people who swore they'd never come to church come and feel the Spirit there. It was awesome. :)

I'm grateful for the Gospel of Jesus Christ and I know that it's for everyone. It's just like Nephi says in 2 Nephi 31:32 to end his sermon on the Gospel of Jesus Christ: "And now, behold, my beloved brethren, this is the way; and there is none other way nor name given under heaven whereby man can be saved in the kingdom of God. And now, behold, this is the doctrine of Christ, and the only and true doctrine of the Father, and of the Son, and of the Holy Ghost, which is one God, without end. Amen."

So, if any of you are feeling particularly brave here's a challenge I received from my mission President. Buy a new copy of the Book of Mormon (one of the soft cover blue ones is $2.50 at store.lds.org) and go through marking anything relating to the gospel of Jesus Christ. So any reference to faith, repentance, baptism, the gift of the Holy Ghost, or enduring to the end. See what you learn & notice. :)

And in case you missed it, here is latest original song. :)

I hope you all have a great week!

Inspiration and Making of "Song for You"--an original song

Hey Everybody!

So, this is my 60th post on this blog. Woot, woot! :D This particular post has been a long time in the making. You may have read in previous posts here and there about how I love to write. Two years ago I took a songwriting class and I've been writing songs ever since. It's something I love to do because it combines my two greatest loves--music and writing! Best of both worlds.

For those of you who haven't seen my video yet, here it is!



"Song for You" was conceived two years ago while I was in my songwriting class. Those of you who know me know that I'm a fairly introverted person and I get really nervous letting other people hear me sing or listen to my songs. So when this tune and the first verse popped into my head, I was downstairs in our washroom where no one could hear me (or at least where I believed no one could hear me). It was around 11 pm. I pulled out my handheld recorder and

Fast forward two years. I recently returned from serving an 18 month mission for the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints, wondering where to go with my life. I found my old recorder and notebook where I'd hummed tunes and scribbled lyrics. When going through the songs, I rediscovered "Song for You." I decided that this was a good place to start when getting back into songwriting. So I sat down at the piano, wrote the last two verses, and got the melody on paper.

After I had the accompaniment worked out, I recorded the song. My original plan was to record a video of me singing the song live, but it just wasn't going to work. I couldn't use 2 mics to record at once when using my webcam. So in the end I recorded the piano, recorded me singing, and combined the 2. :)

Once the song was recorded I realized, "Crap! I need a video to go along with this!" So, I decided to settle for a video of me doing what I do best--silly stick-figure drawings and lip syncing. Haha. It's not the greatest, but I had determined to get this video out ASAP. I'd already put it off too long because, I'll admit it, this is really scary! Putting one of my songs out there like this. But I'm also excited to share what I love with all of you!

Thank you for reading and watching and listening! Hope you all have a fantastic week! :D

Lesson 5: People are different, but we all have an important purpose.

Not sure this post is going to make a ton of sense, but I'm still going to take a whack at sharing my feelings about how awesome it is that we're all different and how we all have a purpose and how our differences can help us fulfill our purpose. :)

My mission was a valuable, amazing experience for many reasons. But one of the biggest blessings and challenges of my mission was working with a lot of different people. As a missionary you're constantly pushed outside your comfort zone and you interact with people you might not normally interact with.

I didn't always understand my companions--why they did what they did, how they reacted to situations. I'm sure they didn't always understand me either. But I can honestly say that my mission is where I started to really love people. Moreover, I started to love people because of our differences.

I'm not exactly sure when this change occurred. I think it happened gradually. But when it did happen, I no longer dreaded going out and talking to strangers. The thought made me excited! Getting to meet so many different people from so many different walks of life is one of the greatest blessings of my mission. I met University football players, professors, homeless men & women, carnival workers, immigrants--people from all walks of life. And one of my favorite parts of the mission was hearing their stories, their perspectives, why they do what they do.

I learned that even though each one of us is different and unique, we're all here for the same purpose--to learn and grow and become like our Heavenly Father. And our Heavenly Father has tailor-made our journey. In the Oct. 2013 General Conference, Elder Richard J. Maynes said this, "Brothers and sisters, we have a loving Heavenly Father who has designed our earthly existence so that we can individually learn the lessons we need to learn to qualify for eternal life in His presence."

Our life is tailored for our specific needs. So getting to talk with others and hear their experiences, their struggles, their concerns--and then helping them understand that those experiences have been given for a purpose was very rewarding. Because even though we're all different, we're all trying for the same thing--to be happy, to be loved. Sometimes people don't know where to find that though. But that is where the gospel of Jesus Christ comes in. It is the only way to lasting peace and lasting happiness in this world. No matter who I met or what their trials were, I knew the gospel of Jesus Christ is what would help them achieve their potential and find and keep happiness.

Another, related lesson to all of this is that Heavenly Father can and will use our unique gifts, talents, and quirks to help others as we go throughout our life. In D&C section 46 the Savior is speaking to Joseph Smith about the gifts of the Spirit and He makes this revealing statement in verses 11 and 12.

"For all have not every gift given unto them; for there are many gifts, and to every man is given a gift by the Spirit of God. To some is given one, and to some is given another, that all may be profited thereby."

Isn't that awesome? Each one of us have been given a gift, a talent, something special and unique. And God expects us to use and share those gifts and talents so that all will be benefited. Because we are unique and different, we all have something unique and different to bring to this world. God wants and expects us to seek to understand our gifts and use them to help His children.

Something I've struggled with since getting home from my mission is finding my purpose. How can I use the talents God has given me to help others? I'm slowly figuring it out . . . I think. Haha. But on Sunday I found this really cool video that I wanted to share.



So, know that you're loved! Know that you are unique! Know that you have talents and gifts to offer the world that only you can offer!:D